dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.