just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize