Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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