She announced her abortion via fbk
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
