I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize