wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Randomize
