It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
