does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize