can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize