hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize