i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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