woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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