Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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