I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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