I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
