Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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