the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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