Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
BRING THE BAGELS
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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