when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
