Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
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