Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
