i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
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she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
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I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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