I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize