Kiss
Puke
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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