DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
