he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
how drunk are you?
Several
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
