i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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