I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
i believe in u and ur pee
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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