she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Come see our sink grown plant.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
