i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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