am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
