Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
