Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
