don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
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