Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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