My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Randomize
