Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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