u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize