im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
