it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
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it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
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As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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