I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
