ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
