She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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