Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
we're making bets on your personal life
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Randomize
