Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
