To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
