1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
