it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize