yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize