youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize
